If you ever watched Oprah, one particular thought may have entered your mind just like me: Why on earth is Oprah so popular? On her show, the audience, mostly white women (and the occasional gay guy) are screaming and clapping like she is a rock star, and she gets to interview all the top stars in Hollywood. A US magazine even named her one of the most powerful women in the world, higher than CEOs and Martha Stewart. So why is she so popular? Top Ten Reasons Oprah is So Popular She has no competition. How many prime time talk show hosts do you know? She’s not really popular. Every…

I was in a pet store today. You know, it’s that big chain that has sprouted in shopping centres across the Klang Valley in the last few years. I love going to these places, despite some people’s apprehension about the smell and sight of animal droppings. Then there are those who decry putting the poor animals in small, bright enclosures, being tapped on by screaming kids. Anyway. I was there at this branch that opened last year, but I have yet to enter this one. In the Perspex cages where they house the hamsters and other cuddly furries, there was a hedgehog. Wow, first time I’ve seen one! In books…

Some time ago I used to work less than 2 miles away from the Shah Alam Stadium. You would think that there would traffic problems working so near a stadium with a seating capacity of 80,000. But in the 5 years I was stationed there, there never was a time it was congested. Because the stadium was never used much. The only time I knew it was in use was when the state football team Selangor played during the Malaysia Cup home matches (or M-League or Super League or whatever they call it these days). But that happened only on Saturday nights and by then I would have long left…

You have to excuse Simon… he is delirious from high fever, a burning throat and probably high from the antibiotics. So he will be doing something he HAS NEVER DONE BEFORE… he is going to blog something about HIMSELF… Aaaaargh!! Parents, hide your children!!! Top Ten Things You May Not Know About Simon He has watched every episode of the first two seasons of Teen Titans at least 3 three times. (Starfire is SUCH a babe! ) He used to listen to a lot of metal, but his four favourites are Metallica, Megadeth, Helloween and Manowar. (Aiiiieeeee… black metal….!!!) In the early nineties, he was one of the first people…

Sorry folks, no long post today, Simon is recovering from illness. Plus have to do some work before a big event this weekend. I hate falling sick. Anyway, thanks for dropping by…

Top Ten Reasons Why Malaysians Love to Dye Their Hair Blond To camouflage themselves when they hide in a huge barn full of Honey Stars. Natural black hair is so… Asian. It’s not hair dye. It’s the caked mud from the dirty water supply in the Klang Valley. To match the colour of the dragon imprint on their T-shirts. Or the screaming gold-coloured fake Gucci Ah Lian handbag. Because their 56-year old Ah Lian mother also did it. To blend in with the Portuguese and Dutch when they invade and colonize Malaysia again. Some time soon. Most ah bengs don’t dye die their hair. They never wash their hair for…

For those of you regular readers who read yesterday’s post (yes, all two of you…), you might get the idea why I’m doing this today. Well, then again, maybe not… Top Ten Reasons Why Dinosaurs Went Extinct The Brontosaurus started experimenting with smoking coconut trees stuffed with tobacco, then it spread to all the other dinosaurs, and soon cancer wiped them out from the face of the earth. Sex education was very poor during the pre-historic Jurassic Age. Turf wars between the Clan of the Sabre-Toothed Warriors (led by the T-Rexes) against the Brotherhood of the Prehistoric Kings (headed by the Velociraptors) annihilated themselves out. The Chinese fore-fathers during Emperor…

It’s more than USD70 per barrel now. God knows how high its going to get here in Malaysia… Top Ten Signs the Price of Petrol Is Just Too Expensive in Malaysia Petrol pump attendants wear Rolex watches and provide Mont Blanc pens for customers to sign the credit card slips. Even private car owners are lining up for miles with the taxis to pump NGV. Former VCD peddlers have switched to selling cans of petrol illegally to patrons of Chinese coffeeshops. The LCD price indicator display for new petrol pumps have FOUR digits (just in case the price hits more than RM10.00 per litre). Even the Ah Beng racer boys…

Yesterday was a slow day, so I tried exploring Ask Yahoo! I’ve had it installed for more than 6 years now, I really look forward to them answering a trivial question from netsurfers everyday. **** Anyways, the question of yesterday was, Why does Donald Duck never wear pants? Long answer? Its some repressive anal retentive mal-adjusted childhood phobia that originated from Donald’s traumatic experience involving a stuck fly zipper and his abusive uncle Scrooge McDuck. Short answer? Because he’s drawn that way. **** Then I clicked on the ‘related question’ link where the question was… What kind of creature is Grimace from McDonald’s? Long answer? Interesting question. I’ve always wondered…

This topic was suggested by Pat like 5 months ago, was reading the old mails and found it. I hate school reunions. Or any gathering with people from the past. No idea why. Maybe it’s the people I don’t like, but I’m always not bothered to attend… Top Ten Things NOT to Say During High School Reunions “Eh, you’re still single and no girlfriend? What happened to that girl you were dating for 15 years? She dumped you?” “No children after 10 years? Why’s that? Low sperm count? Maybe you shouldn’t wear so tight underwear…” “Hahaha! Ray, I still remember the time back in school when you had that huge…