For those of you regular readers who read yesterday’s post (yes, all two of you…), you might get the idea why I’m doing this today. Well, then again, maybe not…
Top Ten Reasons Why Dinosaurs Went Extinct
The Brontosaurus started experimenting with smoking coconut trees stuffed with tobacco, then it spread to all the other dinosaurs, and soon cancer wiped them out from the face of the earth.
Sex education was very poor during the pre-historic Jurassic Age.
Turf wars between the Clan of the Sabre-Toothed Warriors (led by the T-Rexes) against the Brotherhood of the Prehistoric Kings (headed by the Velociraptors) annihilated themselves out.
The Chinese fore-fathers during Emperor Shih Huang Ti’s time developed an intense liking for an exotic delicacy – dino testicles boiled with ginseng. Apparently, it improved men’s virility.
Exposure to the laser rays from the Ancient Astronauts spaceship made all the male dinosaurs sterile.
When Halley’s Comet passed by REALLY close 5 million years ago, all of them hopped onto it for a ride.
Turok hunted them and killed them all. (heheh, a inside joke for the old school guys…)
They didn’t really go extinct. Over the millions of years, they just mutated into mudskippers and cockroaches.
The REAL TRUTH: Dinosaurs were gay.
They committed mass suicide because they knew they would be worth US$70 per barrel one day.
20 Comments
egghead
I thought is because all the dino wanted to book a place in the British Museum and to be displayed for ages to come!
consuela
hehe…
a nice end to a really L-O-N-G day
*i hate MONDAYS!*
totoro
Turok roks! Actually played the game too. Sheesh.
mahagurusia
Hey what happened to the theory of meteorite striking earth zillion moons ago, bringing with funny disease like cholera?
Yvy
thank god barney survived!!! =P
Yvy
*aiyak…forgot to run for cover!!!!*
Shan
“The REAL TRUTH: Dinosaurs were gay.”
OMG hahahahahahahaha – owchies my tummy hurts from laughing too much. Simon, stop being so funny. You’re gonna give me an injury.:D
Inevitable
Haha … good one especially the last reason
lilian
You know what? My kids often asked me, who created the dinosaur. So, I tembak lor, at first, God created dinosaurs. Then, dinosaurs were boring. So, God wiped them out and created stubborn kids like them.
hedonistics
dinosaurs were almost impossible to house-train, thus they didn’t make good pets and so cavemen killed them because dinos were virtually useless.
anjali*
wow. never thought dinasours are so selfless, to die for human. *sob*
simon
egghead – but only *one* dino gets to be at the British Museum!
consuela – hmmm… monday there is already tuesday here…
turok – never played the game. only read the comic…
mahagurusia – maybe dinos are immune to cholera. Cancer yes, but cholera maybe not…
yvy – oooh… that’s it… the barney lovers are coming for you.
shan – it could be true, you know… 🙂
inevitable – the last one is the most important one!
lilian – more useful parenting tips from lilian!!! 😛
hedonistic – not true. have you watched Flintstones?
anjali – sad truth of life, really…
CLF
# They committed mass suicide because they knew they would be worth US$70 per barrel one day.
LMAO!! Simon you always think of something damn funny that normal people cant think of!! GOOD JON!! d(^__^)
Sharl612
When Halley’s Comet passed by REALLY close 5 million years ago, all of them hopped onto it for a ride.
The meteorite theory is taking a twist here. *lol*
simon
CLF – that’s where it all comes from, man…
sharl612 – comet and meteorite different one ma…! 🙂
Alex
I think it’s because of the unadulterated, 100% pure cannabis plant in the very beginning. Herbivorous dinosaurs fed on them, got high, and developed enough strength to fight the carnivorous ones. Like in err..gladiator fights. Fight to death! Yahoo!
93~94
Not Ultraman mei?
gay dude
lol this is well funny omg dinos being gay
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chloeeeeee
is this spose to be funny or summit?
cus it ent :L