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Top Ten Things NOT to Say During High School Reunions

Published by simon on October 5, 2005

This topic was suggested by Pat like 5 months ago, was reading the old mails and found it.

I hate school reunions. Or any gathering with people from the past. No idea why. Maybe it’s the people I don’t like, but I’m always not bothered to attend…

Top Ten Things NOT to Say During High School Reunions

“Eh, you’re still single and no girlfriend? What happened to that girl you were dating for 15 years? She dumped you?”

  • “No children after 10 years? Why’s that? Low sperm count? Maybe you shouldn’t wear so tight underwear…”

  • “Hahaha! Ray, I still remember the time back in school when you had that huge pervy crush on our Physical Education teacher! HAhahahahaha…oh, you married him? Wow, I didn’t realize gay marriages are legal in this country…”

  • “Still a school teacher after all these years ah? Change job la! You see I promoted manager already, you know…”

  • “Joe, remember the 20 bucks I lent you to buy fags back in 1988? When are you going to return it…?”

  • “Wow, you used to be a hot babe back in school…what happened? Motherhood has been tough, eh?”

  • “Maybe you should ask yourself why you are still not married after all these years. Is it because you are afraid of commitment? Or is it you are not meeting enough girls/guys? Or that you have some deep emotional scarring regarding your father/mother/dead pet…”
    (At this point somebody is going to get a tight slap).

  • “OK, now I understand why they say only losers with no life attend all these school reunions…”

  • Really? We were classmates for 6 six years? How come I don’t remember you aa?”

  • “Wow, you REALLY put on a lot of weight, huh? Why, no exercise aa?”
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    Comments (15)
    1. Jason Said,

      Damn, I agree with the last one. Always say I gain weight. KNN! ANother thing is they would bring up the most embarassing moment when u are schooling. KNN!

    2. yuin Said,

      jason: I’d reply to that remark with a ‘oh, life’s been good to me, very prosperous now, what bout you? you look pretty skinny…not doing too good?’

      but that only applies to guys i guess.

    3. lucia Said,

      i hate people saying to me “ah i remember you. you were the smallest girl in class.”

      gee… as if i need to be reminded of that (though it is not something bad lah).

      just last sunday i met my ex neighbour (an old lady) who had not seen me for about 8 years. the first thing she said to me was “i cannot recognise you at all. you are so fat now!”.

      WTF!

    4. anjali* Said,

      “Hey Joe, what happen to your curry puff jambul?”

      “Hi Annie, you still wearing those colorful panties your grandma used to sew for you? You passed them on to your daughters??? Wow!”

    5. lilian Said,

      Thank goodness I went to a kampung school. All my schoolmates are busy selling fishes and porks as in fishmongers and butchers. Who has time for school reunions anyway. Unless they are Amway distributors or insurance salespersons! LOL!

    6. mahagurusia Said,

      Yeah I know what you meant Simon but its heart warming to know after so many years later, some flew back from thousands of miles, just to attend a reunion. While its sad to see the ones here, never made any effort. I wondered why? Is it the insecurity about themselves or are they worried about the past or the present? Maybe people are too conscious about what other people thinks. Reunion is simply about meeting up old friend from schools and that’s it. Let bygones be bygones and nobody will notice any details.

      So if your next reunion comes around, don’t worry unnecessarily. Let the hair down and (try to) have fun. :-)

    7. Yvy Said,

      o how i HATE those, you look so different….fatter now. very prosperous huh? HA HA HA….u think so funny meh??? *grumbles to self*

      but then, i also recently found out that 2 of my juniors actually had a crush on MOI….the low profile geeky/nerdy girl…aiyooo, n these are the fella telling me now that i’m fat! aiyooo…..*slaps head* lost my fan club lar. :(

    8. Inevitable Said,

      my no-so-close friend actually said,
      “Wah, what happened to you? You have been taking drugs ah … so thin already ..”

      Fcuk him!

    9. Sexymama Said,

      And also don’t say,” OYO, the pimples you had last time really leave a lot of holes on your face hoh..”

    10. S-Kay Said,

      WAAHAHAHHAHAHA……dei…..I remembered a guy who said he used to have a crush on me when I was in Primary school.

    11. simon Said,

      jason - maybe you should say, “because i got no money to do liposuction like you lor!”

      yuin - i suppose its opposite for guys and girls.

      lucia - to which you should swing your bag with the brick inside at them.

      anjali - “sorry aa? victoria’s secret bought out my underwear design for USD24mil, so i can’t wear them now…”

      lilian - but kampung fishmonger also can be filthy rich now eh…

      mahagurusia - ok, maybe i’ll go and flash my new silver mercedes CLK at them…

      yvy - but that’s kind of shallow of them right?

      inevitable - tell him “thin better than fat, right?”

      sexymama - you should say, “you want a hole in your face now or not?!”

    12. simon Said,

      s-kay - i hope he is rich and drives a CLK now! woo-hoo!

    13. Pat Said,

      I always have a Form 5 class reunion during CNY every year, and year after year they say I still look the same :)

      The most embarrassing thing about class reunions is forgetting your friends’ names!

    14. Maria Said,

      If all this thing being said in the reunion, sure came out from the reunion with a face fat like grapefruit, being slap left right center.

    15. Jay's Malaysia Diary (Jürgen Hösch's Malaysia Tagebuch) Said,

      10 good reasons to blog in a foreign language

      Sabine inspired me to this post, talking about the German spelling reform. I had this issue covered through an article analysing why blogging for me in English is the right decision. But I think there is a more humorous approach to this question, so here

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