Journey to the North Part 2: Dim Sum and Beyond the Perak River

This is the continuation of yesterday’s posting. Warning, though, lots of pics. Not friendly to dial-up connection, yadda yadda yadda… zzz…

Anyways, so we spent a night in a hotel in Ipoh. My ex-colleague was telling me that when he stayed in a hotel in the same town some years back, some pimp will come and knock on your door in the middle of the night and ask you lasciviously, “Oi lui mou?” (‘Want a girl?’) If you don’t get it, he’s not offering you orphaned young babies for adoption under some social service scheme.

Nope, that definitely didn’t happen to us, although we were most probably stoned asleep after the long drive. Oh, wait, one more thing about this hotel:

No wonder some people say Ipoh people very ‘paat’ (busybody) one. Since it is mentioned here, did you hear about that femes blogger who… oh, never mind.

Right. So we woke up early Friday morning to go eat dim sum.

(Side note: For those unfamiliar with Cantonese cuisine, dim sum – the effervescent breakfast staple across the Chinese world. It’s actually hundreds of different varieties of pork, shrimp or chicken, steamed or fried in a numerous ways. It’s a little bit like sushi, except that its cooked, not raw. Most popular types are siew mai (steamed shrimp wrapped in thin dough), fishball, har kau (prawn dumpling) and wu kok (pork and oyster sauce wrapped in deep fried yam pastry). Dang this translation stuff is difficult. Anyways, Ipoh being the heartland of Malaysian Cantonese, has the pre-eminent dim sum restaurants in the land. Contrary to what KL folks think. End of side note.)

So we took off on the deserted streets of Ipoh New Town (Sun Kai Cheong) to Foh San restaurant. Actually, this is my second time there, my brother-in-law always takes us to Tai Thong, which incidentally, is in the hotel we stayed. The last time I went to Foh San, my goodness, it was packed to the brim. These old ladies were actually standing at the kitchen doorway to grab the food as it came out! James of Loopymeals says that Foh San is not as popular anymore, but on weekends, its like the Hari Raya open house at the Prime Minister’s residence.

Foh San was actually only half empty, since it was quite early. Dim sum was excellent, I didn’t manage to get a good shot of the food, it disappeared as soon as it hit the table. But I did get this shot of the teapot. Yes, the teapot.

Get this, the Chinese teapot manufacturer has their own website. I bet their company blog should be launching soon. (“We’re launching this new line of Japanese themed pots with flowery motifs, I’m very sure it’ll do well…”)

After dim sum, it was more food… it was down to Old Town for some authentic white coffee, and roti bakar.

Some of us thought the food was heavenly, apparently, judging from the reaction.

On the way there, I saw this. Hah, they named it after you, Pat!

Anyway, after spending like an hour at those old fashion toy shops in town (where they stock up on every imaginable toy from your childhood), we set off on the road again. It drizzled all the way after a night of heavy showers, so the weather was cooling and dream-like.

We stopped at the Dataran Sg. Perak rest area for a toilet break. I remember this place had a lot of local fruit stalls, but there seem to be less this time around. Maybe its not in season yet.

Yep, this was the river that was responsible for at least 3 chapters of our Form 2 History textbooks.

(Cue another sidenote: In the 16th to 19th century, travel in the Malaya Peninsula was restricted to jungle trekking and via the rivers on a wooden boat. This particular river, was an important artery for transporting goods and exports like tin ore, rubber, spices, pirated DVDs, et al. Three warring sultanates resided along this river, up until after the arrival of the British bringing colonialism and Premier League footie along with them. For further reading, check out the Pangkor Treaty of 1874 and other related stories. End of yet another pointless side note.)

Anyway, this is one of our friends too engrossed in the Chinese papers. Yes, that’s me in the reflection.

After a short break, it was the open road again… along the way, we passed what my wife called the ‘fire mountain’. With the mist and red earth, it really looks like the mountain is in flames, doesn’t it?

‘Sawah padi’. (or ‘bendang’, paddy fields).

(Oh no, not another side note: Rice, the staple diet of most Asians, was aggressively cultivated in the Malaya Peninsula for many centuries. These days, most of our rice is imported from Thailand as our paddy fields are slowly converted into housing estates or other more lucrative cash crops. Whatever rice we produce is probably used to make nasi lemak, pulut and the occasional lemang. End of this side note.)

Next: Journey to the North Part 3 – Pearl of the Orient…

Journey to The North Part 1: Ipoh in the Twilight

So it began like this. Some months ago, a few of us decided to go for a SG holiday as together, as we do annually. Three years ago it was Melaka town. Cue lots of photo snapping at the historical monuments. And lots of durian cendol.

Then the year after that it was er… let me see… it was Fraser’s Hill. A little further, but still within driving distance. Can’t remember much about what we did there, lots of card games and Pictionary, i suppose. Yeah, there was this awesome waterfall, too. Then last year, we decided to go a little further than the two hour driving radius. Heck, let’s go all the way to the other side of the peninsula, so went to Cherating. So it was 5 butt numbing hours in the car as we trek across the Banjaran Titiwangsa.

(Side note: For the benefit of our non-Malaysian readers, the Banjaran Titiwangsa, or the ‘Angel Bridge Range’, harks back to our Primary 5 geographical lessons. A beautiful range of forested mountains that divide the Malaya peninsula, it has always served as a physical and psychological barrier between the more progressive West Coast and the traditional East Coast. Right about now, some of us will be having recurring nightmares about the horrors of school exams. End of sidenote)

So this year, we decided to go somewhere exciting and different. We had a few choices:

1. Phuket
2. Bali
3. Karambunai, Sabah
4. Pulau Sipadan, Sabah
5. Hong Kong Disneyland.
6. Highbury, London(I was outvoted on this)

Unfortunately, two minutes into the planning, we realized that we had no freaking budget to speak of, and public donations for our ‘Send Us On Holiday’ campaign was a disaster. So we had to scratch off Phuket, Bali and Karambunai. Some of us didn’t want Sipadan either, no idea why, and the bird flu threat left us with no choices at all.

So we decided to go to Penang and Ipoh. Penang, because SA is from there, and since she’s never joined us for a trip together before, i thought this was a surefire was to make sure she’d be there this time.

The plan was this – we put up one night in Ipoh after work on Thursday, and on Friday morning shoot off to Penang. That way, we get to savour some Ipoh food on the way, and break the journey to two legs. And so the 12 of us (SA joined us in Penang) left the traffic horrors and pollution of KL, towards the limestone hills of the north…

We reached Ipoh a little before 10pm. This is where we stayed, Heritage Hotel:

And this is the view in front of the hotel.

The two pix above were actually taken at dawn, not in the evening.

This is the lobby lounge, viewed from outside our room. There’s koi in the pond, but can’t see it from here.

At night for supper, we decided to go out to eat at the famous Beansprout Chicken place:

Yeah, I know, the picture is dark, my cam doesn’t have a good flash. There is another rival shop across the road:

Sadly, both places were nearly deserted due to the bird flu scare. Usually, even on weeknights, the two shops would be packed with people. On weekends people line up to get seats. Some pics to satisfy the readers:

That’s the fat taugeh (beansprouts) with the pork and fishball soup. Delicious.

And the serene Ipoh town in the early hours of the morning (taken from our hotel windows):

And finally, I saw this at the hotel lobby:

Tomorrow: Part 2 – Dim Sum and the journey continues across the mighty Perak River…

Technorati Tags: Melaka, Fraser’s Hill, Penang, Ipoh, Heritage Hotel, Beansprout Chicken, bird flu

About Ipoh, Penang and KL

I’ve just come home from a weekend holiday to the North – Ipoh and Penang, to be specific. I’ve got lots of stories to write about and photos to show, but right now I’m too pooped to do much, hopefully it’ll be done in the next few days. I’m got to get the photos uploaded and grab some pix from my friends’ cams, my cam’s battery died on me halfway without a backup…

So keep an eye out for the next few postings… meanwhile:

Five Things I Like About Penang

• The food.
• Penang Hill.
• The beach.
• Did I mention the food?
• The old pre-war buildings. Well, at least the ones they are trying to preserve, anyway. So many more left derelict.

Five Things I Like About Ipoh

• The food.
• Everything is a whole lot cheaper (well, mostly).
• No traffic jams (except near Jaya Jusco Kinta City), no speeding maniacal drivers and deranged kiasu drivers (not that I encountered lah…)
• Those old fashioned toy shops in the centre of old town.
• The white coffee.

Five Things Similar between Penang and KL.

• The traffic.
• In some areas, more Mat Sallehs than Malaysians.
• Condominiums coming up like mushroom after the rain.
• Can’t go two streets without seeing a McDonalds.
• The parking problem.

Five Things Similar between Ipoh and KL.

• (Almost) Everyone speaks Cantonese.
• Traffic lights takes ages to change to green.
• Awesome mamak stalls everywhere.
• Welcome to Pirated DVD Central.
• Every other food stall is ‘Famous’ this or ‘Famous’ that.

Technorati Tags: Penang Hill, food, Penang, Mat Salleh, McDonalds, Ipoh, KL

Plugging Some Blogs

I know I plugged Jolene’s blog before, but I have to do this one.

Best post I’ve read in a long time. (Be patient. It loads s l o w l y…)

I’m not a particularly mushy person, but i think it kinda speaks to anyone who has ever been in love.

It really reminded me of a post i wrote some time back, Searching for Your Soulmate. Don’t worry, this one loads faster.

***

While I’m on the subject of plugging other blogs, you can check out this one, by a polymath from Singapore who’s actually studying in US at the moment. I don’t read as many Singaporean blogs as Malaysian and American ones, but this is one i check out regularly.

Its also a good place to explore some other good singaporean blogs, its listed on the sidebar. And no, he didn’t list XX.

***

Anyways. Its a slow day today. And I’m hungry already.

This Year No Calendar Lah…

I seem to have very few table calendars this year. By table calendar, I mean the those half A4 types that stand up, and you flip them over every month, not those A3 size ones where you hide your resume under it. Every year I usually get lots and lots of them for the past few years, from my suppliers, sub-contractors, bankers or anybody who thinks I’m a position to give them business (hah, how wrong they were!). Usually I get like 20, I pass them to my parents and my friends (yeah, maybe THEY can give these suppliers some business).

Anyways, this year has been pretty squalid. I have only 3 – one sitting on my office desk next to the garbage compactor room, the other one is at home. I can’t remember where the third one is. It’s probably desecrated by my wannabe artist daughter.

Speaking of table calendars, there are only usually a few things they show on the calendar, other than the days of the month I mean. Well, there are:

Bland calendars – Usually picture of flowers, outdoor scenery, more flowers, more outdoor scenery, scenic cottages in the middle of Scotland, flowers…

Cheapskate calendars – No pictures, just the date tables. And they have the cheek to cram two months on one page. These calendars are the same everywhere, they just print the name of the company in gold letters at the bottom of the cardboard base. Usually something like Syarikat Kenderaan Yick Huat.

Product calendars – Usually pictures of the product of the company is trying to sell. Usually, its some obscure machine part or industrial whatchamacallit, I get the most of these types. Currently, the one on my desk is some thingamajig they use to do something or other to that thing you use for kablooing.

Inspirational calendars – Some people just LOOOOVE these. They have some mumbo-jumbo inspirational saying like “Seize the day, failure is only in your mind” or something like that printed in big colourful letters. I cannot tahan these types.

Nudie girls – the most popular type. In this office I used to work in, the HR manger had like 4 or 5 of these fleshy calendars all over his open cubicles. Including those huge poster sized wall calendars. And he shared this cubicle with a pregnant colleague.

Staff calendars – believe it or not, I received this unusual calendar from a huge public listed local company many years back. They actual asked 12 of their female staff to pose as models in the calendar! Nothing risqué, the ladies were dressed in typical office clothes, flashing their million dollar smiles. The January and February girls were pretty young things, but as the months went on to November and December, well… My question is this, why didn’t they a male model calendar version?!

Crap calendars – The cheapest kind of calendars, with 6 unrelated random pixelated photos downloaded from the ‘Net. My dad usually ends up with them.

Some days I miss those calendars with the small pictures of horses and jockeys on them…

MATTA, MATTA, matta…

Was at MATTA Fair over the weekend. This was my first time there, I was bracing for an mass of human bodies. It was packed alright. These people started parking their cars on the ramp leading to PWTC across Jalan Tun Razak. OMG, how kiasu can they be?! We got a parking spot easily at Hentian Putra.

The thing about expos like MATTA Fair is that if you’re really into it, time flies like a bird when you’re there. We only covered like 50% of the 4 super-big halls and it was time for us to leave for another appointment.

***

To get the most out of MATTA Fair, you must be sure of the date that you want to go on the holiday, then only go to the expo, because they need you to confirm the date of travel to enjoy their rebates and discounts. Unless you’re going there do some research like me.

***

There was a booth selling those massage chairs there. What’s the connection?! You’re exhausted after returning from an overseas holidays, so you need a massage chair to release your tension? Isn’t that why you went for a holiday in the first place?!

The credit card hawkers I can understand, they sprout out everywhere where humans form a civilization. They were there alright, thrusting their ‘free-for-life’ cards into my face as I passed. They even resorted to blocking people from passing the narrow walkway.

***

And SpongeBob Squarepants made an appearance. Yes, that’s right, when you think of Malaysian tour agents and holiday packages, you immediately think of that yellow gay icon cartoon character, apparently.

Top Ten Reasons Why Simon Cowell is So Nasty On American Idol

Horrendous. Ghastly. If I’m being honest with you, it reminds me of a bad wedding band performance. Simon Cowell, well, he’s perennially nasty and unforgiving in the American Idol judges chair. Ever wonder why? I dunno, I have a few theories…

Top Ten Reasons Why Simon Cowell is So Nasty On American Idol

• Hot burning angst and frustration stemming from him unable to get Paula Abdul to go out with him.

• He’s always insanely jealous that Ryan Seacrest gets more camera time than him. And fan mail from the girls.

• Ryan Seacrest keeps babbling on and on, prolonging the taping of the show, thereby making Simon late for his favourite cabaret / karaoke session / cruise liner dinner performance right after that.

• None of the contestants ever sing his REAL favourite song, “YMCA” by the Village People.

• Simon Cowell’s Pet Peeve No #242: He just HATES the way Randy Jackson keeps using terms like ‘dawg’, ‘da bomb’, ‘pitchy’ and ‘worked it out’. Like, why can’t these people speak the Queen’s English like him?!

• Randy Jackson always swipes his complimentary soft drink.

• Paula Abdul’s spittle flies everywhere every time she speaks. And you know how Simon HATES getting his arms (and face) wet…

• Ryan Seacrest’s one-day stubble drives him crazy.

• In addition to black baby T-shirt in on too tight, his khaki pants pulled up too high, cutting off blood circulation to vital organs.

• It’s an open secret he had a woefully short unsuccessful singing career (as a glitzy glam rocker) during his idealistic youth, so you know what they say about failed singers being the worst music critics…

Technorati Tags: American Idol, Paula Abdul, Ryan Seacrest, Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson

Horizontal Stripes Make You Look…

My friend likes to wear horizontal stripes. He isn’t pudgy or anything like that, he’s quite slim, actually. Not Kate Moss slim, but still not flabby either. More like Ryan Seacrest slim. Or should I say Seacresty? Okay, fine, fine, I need to lay off watching too much American Idol.

Anyways, this guy I know always wear horizontal stripes. I see him once or twice a week, and he’s always sporting the same fashion. Not one outfit all the time, but different outfits, but they all look alike.

We’re not talking thin stripes like a jailbird, but thick hoops like Dennis the Menace (the British lad, not the American one). Not as thick like girdles or the Bhoys of on the green side of Glasgow (okay, not many of you will get that reference), more like rugby rings.

I’ve seen him wear black and cream, black and white (you’d think it would look like a zebra, but you’d be wrong). He has a few other circular-ish combinations, I shan’t go into the specifics.

Of late I’ve noticed some of my friends wear solely polo tees sponsored by computer and IT firms, especially those that work in the industry. You know the type – white, black or navy blue, with the company name embroidered on the left breast and sometimes outer sleeve. Its usually Microsoft, HP, AutoCAD, or SAP. I myself have a few, but these guys wear them everyday, to work and to the mamak.

But not this horizontal-stripes-friend of mine. Even though he works in one of those firms, it’s alternating coloured strips for him all the way.

One day, if I’m in a strange mood, I’d probably ask him, “Hey, Joe*, what’s with the horizontal stripes? Are you advertising for a barber shop?!”

*not his real name.

Technorati Tags: Ryan Seacrest, American Idol, Dennis the Menace

My Neighbour And The 3 Dogs

My neighbour has 3 dogs. If you think that’s a lot, get this. They used to have 5. Some of my other neighbours complained to the landlord, so they got rid of two of the uglier shaggier ones. I think they gave it to their friends, so there’s three remaining now. The three aren’t dogshow material either, they aren’t exactly the types you see on the cover of Alpo tins or on those dog food commercials.

Before I go on, let me just say I love dogs, I grew up with two lovable mongrels. But the reason I don’t keep dogs now is that my house isn’t appropriate to rear dogs. Dogs need wide spaces to run and exercise and have fun, and my miniscule rent-control house with a lawn smaller than your office toilet isn’t suitable for any pets bigger than a rabbit.

But hey, that didn’t stop my neighbour. She could have kept smaller animals like hamsters, goldfish or anacondas, but no, she kept dogs. And their whole lawn in cemented and tiled, with not a blade of grass. Unless you count the moss growing in the dog’s supper bowl.

About the lawn. My neighbour isn’t at home the whole day, so the dogs are cooped indoors the whole day. So they eat, sleep, bark (boy, do they bark. Bark, and bark and bark. And howl.) and do pretty much everything. Including piss and shit. Therein lies the problem.

I can take the all-night barking, since I’m used to dogs, but my OTHER neighbours are pretty annoyed with the dog faeces all over their porch. Imagine how much 3 dogs eat in a day, so you can imagine how much faeces you get.

In addition to the flies and wonderful smell, the other problem is the dogs have found a way to sneak out of the wire mesh on the gate to go outside when the owner isn’t around. Then they shit outside, and in my other neighbours house. They never come into my house, probably the smell of stray anacondas at my place scare the bejasus out of the poor dogs.

Anyway, one day the dog went into my other peaceful loving neighbour’s house, then without them knowing it, they drove over it, splattering the shit all across their porch, unknowingly stepped on it, stepped into their expensive new car, you get the picture.

I can see you picturing it in your mind.

Anyway, the dogs are kind of nice to me. When I come home at night, they always poke their noses through the fence and wag their tails at me. Nice dogs. Only if you don’t look at the faeces all over the lawn.

Technorati Tags: dog, dogs

Top Ten Signs You’ve Been Downloading Too Many Shows on BitTorrent

First there was napster. Then came Morpheus, Kazaa and Grokster. Now there’s BitTorent. It’s really becoming big, some of my friends haven’t touched their DVDs and cable remote for months…

Top Ten Signs You’ve Been Downloading Too Many Shows on BitTorrent

• You can’t remember how to operate your TV remote anymore.

• When your boss asks you to locate the invoice file from the cabinet, you first locate the ‘torrent’…

• You know small details like season 1 of Desperate Housewives has 22 episodes, 42 minutes per episode, 3.2GB in size, has 25 seeds, but can’t remember your girlfriend’s telephone number.

• When a software dealer asks you if you use more MS Word or Excel in the office, you answer, “Neither. I use Azureus more.”

• On the days you’re not at work, you’re colleagues call them ‘fast internet connection days’.

• Your ISP has one small dedicated server just for you, they call your IP address ‘Piratebay Malaysia’.

• Your rampant downloading and file-sharing is responsible for causing 14 torrents sites to be shut down by the US authorities.

• You’re not sure what “commercial breaks” are, you think they are those pauses in your BitTorrent viewing when you have to go to the toilet for a leak or a fag.

• When your friend calls you while you are on the toilet seat, you tell him to call you back later as you are “download 92% complete”.

• On TMNet’s Streamyx website, on the List of Top Bandwidth Users, you face appears on number 1.

Technorati Tags: napster, Morpheus, Kazaa, Grokster, BitTorent