EPL: Team by Team Tagline Review

I thought of doing a team by team review of this season’s English Premier League, but I guess there isn’t much to say that hasn’t been done so. So I thought, screw it. Let’s just give a snappy tagline to describe their entire season. Listed here, 20 teams, according to their finishing position in the table…


Chelsea – Muahahahar, money DOES buy success.

Arsenal – Hey, at least we won SOMETHING.
(I’m trying to be non-partisan here…)

Man United – We still THINK we’re the best club in England…

Everton – How to Play With 9 Defenders and One Striker Or Now who wants to buy Cahill for 20 million?

Liverpool – Why didn’t we sack Houllier earlier?!

Bolton – Los Geriatricos: Get awesome free signings, pay through your nose for sky-high salaries.

Middlesbrough – Yawn…

Man City – Shaun Wright-Phillips. And nine other outfield players. And a bumbling goalie.

Tottenham – Let’s see how long this manager lasts…

Aston Villa – We have succeeded in achieving our target of … mid-table obscurity…

Charlton – Hey, look at Scott Parker behind the Chelsea bench!

Birmingham – Were they even playing this season?

Fulham – Damn, remember the good old days when we still had Saha?

Newcastle – All that money and nothing to show. Or Shearer, please stay on for another embarrassing season.

Blackburn – same tagline as Birmingham.

Portsmouth – Hahahaha! Look at Southampton and Redknapp!!

West Brom – What an exhilarating relegation dogfight! Wow, let’s do it again this season!

C Palace – Hey, Andy! Next season ‘get’ us more penalties!

Norwich – We dared to dare like Proton, and failed.

Southampton – Cheap sale! Players and manager going for cheap sale!!



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