The [tag]meme[/tag] was passed on to me by Si Beruang Kutub, and I know its been awhile, but better late than never, right? Right?! Neeways… this is how it goes: I’ve 10 words and have to write an essay based on these 10 words which have to be used at least once. The 10 words are: I me blowjob grapes random power loneliness water robot blue So here goes: Gandalf was having a bad day. The hobbits have ran off to follow Dumbledore, and Aragorn is having a photoshoot for the cover of Modern Knight magazine. “I’m the most bloody-power-ful wizard in this Earth-in-the-Middle, the sea-water and even Asimov’s robots…

What? You’ve never watched [tag]American Idol[/tag]? Every week 20 million plus Americans and even more worldwide watch this show. 2 or 3 times a week. So what’s it about? It’s your school talentime contest. On a much bigger scale. It’s also a popularity contest. It’s also a study in demography and American race studies. It starts with 6-7 weeks of auditions. Hundreds and thousands of wannabe singers, psychopaths, self delusional psychics, lonely cowboys, cross-dressing headcases come and try to impress the 3 judges. So, in short, you’re average American. So out of the 43 million people who audition, usually 200 people are selected to ‘go to Hollywood’. Why ‘go to…

When I was small, balloons weren’t very common. Don’t get me wrong, they were really popular with kids, but you don’t see them as often as you do these days. Those days, balloons were filled with helium, simple fact is that helium, being lighter than air, would cause the balloon to float up by itself, so you would have to hold it by a string to prevent it from floating away into outer space. I’m thinking they use helium because it cheaper than hydrogen, and hydrogen would be freaking dangerous once it is exposed to the atmosphere whenever the balloon pops. And with every 10 kids, 7 of them would…

So, okay I’m back from my short blogging break. Not that anyone noticed. First things first, some long made promises. I’ve was tagged sometime ago by both shan and anjali*, but i had to swear off memes for a month, so now its back. Dun worry, i’ll do yours next, shan! 4 jobs you’ve had in your life Expendable lackey in a bloody hot T-shirt factory. Office boy (also known as ‘industrial training’). Chinaman contractor. cash attendant. In an extremely small sundry shop. The place is so small the mice are hunched-back. 4 movies you could watch over and over. Hmm… I’m not the type that like to watch movies…

You know those high class counters in the shopping centre selling designer perfume and obscenely expensive make up for women? Behind the counter are usually the prettiest sales girls in the shopping centre, dressed up in either white, grey or black, usually with heavy make up and fogged up perfume on their necks. And with highlights in their hair. Every time I pass by, they are usually either touching up their lipstick or spraying free sample perfume to passing by ladies. They never look at or entertain me, because I’m not a woman. I don’t look rich enough to buy any of their products for my wife. They know I’m…

Mr. Tan – Alright, today’s a very important day. Let’s start out mission briefing. Susie – I’m so tired… can I have another 5 minutes of rest? I didn’t get much sleep last night. Mr. Tan – Discipline, Susie. You are a soldier, on a holy mission from the elders, discipline! Don’t make me report you to them… it is tantamount to heresy if you do not do your job! Susie – alright, alright… Get on with of the mission briefing. Mr. Tan – Okay. Like I said, today’s is an important day. It’s Day 6 of the week, the targets will come in the hordes. Susie – Day 6,…

Remembering Kenny. It has been a year. It was just past midnight, on the 3rd of February, 2005. Just a few days before Chinese New Year. It was always at the back of my mind, I didn’t feel like posting about it until I read Pat’s post. Strange thoughts, indeed. I don’t have any photos of the short time I knew him, because he didn’t like taking them due to his condition, but we’ll remember him very well… Here’s to you, Kenny, and don’t forget to turn out the lights. Post script. I’m taking a few days break from this blog, due to some personal reasons. But simontalks will be…

Some of you may remember this earlier post I did. Well, since its another slow day, here’s more of the same. Some more obscure Hollywood [tag]movies[/tag] that strangely were never released here… Hairy Potter and the Prisoner of Alcatraz – The Chewbacca-like wizard boy Hairy Potter (too much hair-growing hormones) is back for another hair-raising (no pun intended) adventure including an escaped convict, the infamous Birdman of Alcatraz, a new found love, Bak Chang, an ethnic Chinese to draw in the lucrative China market. Also Hairy battles the bad guys again, a lot of fainting like a little girl, a lot burning scar on forehead (please, its getting kind of…

I’ve worked with lots managers over the years, some good, some bad. Some even are like that pointy-haired boss in the Dilbert comic strip. But one thing they do, they seldom say what’s on their mind. I’ve no idea why. But I’ve pretty much learnt to understand what they are really saying (to hear between the words, so to speak…). When your boss says: “We’re not looking for someone to blame” or “We’re not blaming you for this screw-up“… He really means: “Yep, I’m blaming you.” *** When your boss says: “The dateline can’t be negotiated…” He really means: “Hope you don’t have any plans on Saturday and Sunday…” ***…

For those of you who follow Hollywood news, you’d know that there’ll be a new [tag]Superman[/tag] movie coming up. While the fan boys are salivating with the prospects of it, while busy discussing this like the size of his chest logo, I’m not exactly totally psyched up yet. Probably it’s because of the old movies they made back in the 80’s. While they weren’t exactly bad, they kind of look cheesy now. Well, at least the TV shows fare much better. They had Lois & Clark in the 80’s and Smallville now. But the million dollar question would be – Who’s cooler? Batman or Superman? Who would win in a…