Excerpt from the Star yesterday: Malaysia’s pop princess aims for international stardom with London gig LONDON: Besides reaching the pinnacle of her dreams, singing sensation Siti Nurhaliza will carry the hopes of Malaysia’s music industry when she makes history with her debut at the Royal Albert Hall on Friday. I’m not a fan of Siti (not by a million light years…), our local ‘pop princess’ (I’ll scream if I hear that cliché again), but I have to admit, getting to perform at the Royal Albert Hall is some achievement for a Malaysian. Skeptics would say that the gomen would have lobbied and pushed for this event to promote Malaysia at…

To all those who affected by the earthquake tremors this morning, I hope that everything is back to normal in your lives by now and let us all continue to pray for and contribute to the victims in Sumatra. Many of you have commented and given personal accounts of the incident, so I won’t go into it. Instead let me cheer up your mood a little bit. (This isn’t a continuation of the Sempit blog. That sequel is coming soon, I promise…) Here are some questions you’ll probably hear from your children in the near future. If you’re not married or do not have children yet, just wait. One day…

Vijaya: Darling, we’ve got to stop meeting in the pantry like this. Kak Esah the cleaning lady is getting suspicious. One day she’s bound to find out about us. Raymond: Trust me, darling. This is the only way. Meeting in the director’s toilet was so wrong, darling. Vijaya: But there are no director’s in our office… And this pantry is so narrow and uncomfortable. Raymond: Let’s talk about us, darling. I don’t care if our colleagues find out about us, darling. I just want to be with you. Vijaya: You don’t understand, Raymond. I’m manager level, you are just an executive… I get 25 days annual leave, you only have…

Just read in the Star yesterday about this novelty restaurant in Melbourne called “The Dark Side”. The gimmick here is that everything in this eatery is pitch dark. The waiters are dressed in black and wear night vision goggles. Oh, yeah. Great idea. They could be serving you beef infested with maggots or the cockfight loser chicken and you wouldn’t even know any better. And the worse thing is that you’ll probably come out of the place with gravy stains and all over your shirt. And how much would a place like charge you? Not at cost price, I can bet you. With all the savings they make on the…

American Idol is really hotting up here. But one thing that gets me is that the judges don’t really know how to express themselves when commenting on the performances. Here are some of the comments they’ve used over and over again… Randy “The Dawg” Jackson: “It was just a-iight for me man.”“Listen, it was your BEST performance, so far.”“What’s up, dawg?”“How do you think you did?”“You da bomb, girl/dude”You’re just like a young Aretha Franklin, girl!”“What’s going down, dawg?”“Dude, it was a little pitchy, but it all came together in the end…” Paula “Not Really An Idol” Abdul: “You really owned the stage, well done.”“I’m a big fan of your…

Except from The Star today: Work for Jobless GradsThe Higher Education Ministry is considering to absorb jobless graduates into local education institutions to teach certain subjects. Minister Datuk Dr Shafie Mohd Salleh said yesterday that these graduates could take up these jobs in schools. “We need to look at specific areas in the education sector which can be filled by these graduates. Oh, yeah. I can imagine it now. Jonathan Chan the IT graduate from University of Nossex, United Kingdom is sent to Sekolah Rendah Kampung Ayak Tawak, Felda Kundang Ulu, in the interiors of the Johor virgin jungle. Jonathan, since he was from Lucky Garden International School and also…

Today is Good Friday. Two thousand years ago, one of the greatest tragedies of human history was unfolding outside the city of Jerusalem. On a lonely hill called Calvary, they led the one called Jesus Christ out to be crucified on a wooden cross. Hung between two thieves, the he was mocked and taunted by the crowd and Roman guards. Betrayed by a friend, hung out to dryAlone in the end, stretched across the skyEclipse the sun, they know not what they doThey say if God is love why would He be so cruel“Scarecrow” by Bride From the sixth hour until the ninth hour darkness came over all the land.…

18 Things I learned from watching HK Cantonese TV serials: When there is a big dinner on a round table, everybody always sit on one half of the table only, even if it means everyone squeezing together. Why nobody dares to sit on THIS side of the table is a great mystery. Every Hong Kong family’s grandparents (which the family visits once in awhile) strangely looks the same. It’s like every family in the whole HK shares only about 4 or 5 grandparents altogether. Most people in Hong Kong are pretty good-looking, with clear and fair skin. There are some who are not so good-looking, they mostly work as shop…

You know that DiGi ad on the radio that rips off Queen’s “We Will Rock You”? It goes something like “SMS at one sen, calls at 15 sen…We will, we will rock you…” I can imagine Freddie Mercury turning in his grave and Brian May squirming in his Bahamas summer home every time they play that sacrilege.Suddenly, the other day I heard another ad by DiGi’s competitor – this time using Queen’s “I Want It All”. What the heck is going on?! What’s with the sudden obsession with using classic rock songs for local ads? I can see it now, all those highly paid ad execs and publicity managers suddenly…

This conversation between MJ and his defense lawyer in his Neverland ranch was secretly taped and leaked out to the press recently. The conversation took place just after the allegations of molestation against MJ first surfaced… MJ: You’re late! I’ve been calling you for the last 2 hours? Where have you been?! Lawyer: I was lost in your stupid Neverland ranch! Why do keep installing those dangerous little-boy-traps? Somebody is going to get seriously hurt one day! MJ: They are not little-boy-traps! They are for catching… er…. Squirrels. Lawyer: Yeah, if the squirrel is 4’6” and weighs a hundred pounds… MJ: They’re for squirrels!! And bears! Lawyer: Yeah, whatever. What…