Starlight Cinema Week (a.k.a. “Disney cartoons making you hurl?”)

Have you ever wanted to watch good anime on a large screen?

Have you dreamed of enjoying subtle Japanese humour and candor under the polluted Malaysian night sky?

Think that Japanese girls with big shimmering eyes, pleated skirt, knee-high socks and pink hair are uber-cool? (Oversized sword optional)

Saccharinely sweet Disney cartoons making you hurl?

Want to understand the Japanese theaterical psyche but cannot understand what heck Kabuki is about?

Want to make under the night sky to the images and haunting music of intricate J-pop ballads (while other people give you weird looks)?

.
.
.
.

Now’s your chance.

Come to the Starlight Cinema Week by Emina Cyber of MMU.

2nd to 5th April. 8pm onwards. It’s free.

Aw heck, just read the poster.

(I’m actually not part of the organizing committee nor an MMU student, all views mentioned above are my own and nothing to do with the good people organizing it. But i love anime, and so this something worth supporting).

It’s Secretary’s Day Again. Woo-hoo.

It’s Secretary’s Day again. Woo-hoo!

Last year I wrote something about Secretary’s Day, as did I the year before. And to this day, I still get incoming clicks from Google on subjects like ‘sexy secretaries’ and ‘secretary’s legs’. The internet never fails to amaze me everyday.

I don’t have a secretary, never had one. But if I had one, these would most likely be true:

• If she was Chinese, she’d be Chinese educated and named either Mandy / Candy / Viola or named after one of the months from April to June.
• If she was a Malay, she’d most likely be tudung-clad and with some pseudo-English Malay name like Liza or Farah or Rina. And she’d be reading Kosmo! or Mastika if she comes in early before work.
• Her husband will come and pick her up at 5pm everyday. Therefore she can’t work late coz she won’t have a ride home.
• If she drives to work, there is a 90% chance that the car would a Kancil or Myvi. One a week she’ll drive her husband’s modified Honda CRX. We all can hear the exhaust when the car turns the corner 2 miles away.
• Table is full of cutesy stuff. If you accidentally move one of the teddy bear / plastic flowers / koala bears / birthday cards even by one micro-inch, she can tell when she comes back.
• Everyday, from 11.47am right up to lunch time at 12.30pm, she’ll be on the phone (with both hands still working on the keyboard) with the other secretaries all over the office debating the biggest question of the day – where to eat for lunch.
• All her pens and erasers have her name written on it. If one is missing she’ll stop everything to look for it.
• Don’t ever take her mug from the pantry and use it, even by accident. All hell will break loose.
• She’ll work in the company on the average 2.72 years. Then the next Liza / Farah / Candy or Mandy will replace her.

Anyway, it’s not I’ll ever have a real secretary. Office boys like me never get one. Happy Secretaries Day, everyone.

Technorati Tags: secretary, secretaries, secretaries day, secretary’s day

Job Application Letter. And A Very Good One At It.

Attn.: The HR Manager,

Dear Sir / Madam,

Application for Post Of XXXXX

I refer to your full page ad in the newspaper ad today, which probably cost a whole lot of money, from which i deduced that you guys are rich and can pay me a lot to do less than my current job. Well, okay, my current job isn’t all that bad, but i screwed up something and would rather leave before more people find out about that fiasco. My company is very good at ‘pointing fingers’, or whatever cool new management buzzword they use to call it. You know my company, your direct competitor, which i will gladly bring all their secrets with me to your company. The address of my company is clearly printed on the envelope containing this letter.

Anyways, please call me for an interview, i haven’t worn my clean shoes and tie for awhile, since my last interview, in fact.

Attached is my resume, feel free to read it. Let me tell you first i can’t remember half of the stuff there, it’s been awhile, i tell ya. In fact i’m not sure if i actually DID most of those stuff, after such a long time, the line between white lies of a padded resume and reality blurs together. Anyway, let’s just assume i did all those stuff and know all that i say i know, ‘k?

Please also keep the interview short – 10 minutes max. I can only lie and keep a straight face that long before i… well, anyway.

Call me. Let’s do lunch.

Regards,
Job Applicant.

But seriously folks, read this to better prepare yourself for all those killer interview questions.

Technorati Tags: interview, job interview, resume, cv

One Year On A Deserted Island…

This one is quite interesting, got it from mott and lilian – the premise is that you’re stuck on a deserted island, and can choose too bring along 5-6 of their most wanted bloggers, for one year.

I’m thinking most Malaysians like me aren’t going to survive long on a deserted island, doesn’t matter even if you were an badge-winning boyscout in your formative years or not. Or for that matter, cookie selling girl guides. Not unless there is a McDonalds’, laundry and 7-11 nearby.

Starting a fire pun dunno how, how to survive one year? But hypothetically speaking la.

First one lemme see, i think i’ll bring along *anjali. She’s a seasoned traveller / backpacker, I’m pretty sure she can help me start a fire / pitch tent / collect firewood / build working solar powered 43″ plasma HDTV. Besides, in the long afternoons, she can entertain us with her tales of travels around the world.

Second one, I’ll bring laundryamah. We all need fresh clean clothes.

Next up – probably 5xmom, yeah i know lots of ppl mentioned her already, but since she good cook, we all need to eat. Can’t live off rain and sunshine on a deserted island right? No need fancy Malaysia’s Best food, can eat (and not still alive) can oredi la. Besides, after 3 days we’ll all probably finish off the coconuts and mangoes already. But before that we need…

Gallivanter to go and catch the wild animals and slaughter them. Manowar style.

And finally, consuela. Since she has loads of experience surviving in a Pacific tropical island paradise… (although that one not quite deserted la).

Five Things You Never Knew About Me

Five Things You Never Knew About Me.

• I’m lefthanded. My dad’s ambidextrous.

• I’m supposed to be wearing glasses, since i can’t really see well in the dark. But I’ve never got round to getting one.
• I hate wearing watches. In the days before handphones, i always kept my watch in my pocket. Lost it once and my mom went ballistic.
• I always keep nine 1sen coins in my wallet. In case i need to use it at one of those places that charge service tax.
• I have tons of junk in my office desk drawer. Once in 3 months or so, I’ll clear it. Then it fills up again…

  From LiewCF, the pro-blogger…

Nothing To Do At Work

Some years back, I worked in this stuffy, serious office right in the middle of the city. It wasn’t any of those offices where the bosses were liberal and every day is Casual Day, this was one of those stuffy, dreary offices where the lighting is dim and everyone was dead boring. Except me la.

There the bosses worked from 9am to 7pm everyday, and if you told them a joke, they’d probably take 24 seconds to get it, then think you just insulted his mother.

The secretaries are all dry, old ladies who still wear fashion from the 70’s.

Anyway, one day this young executive joined the firm. He was all excited about the new job, came in the first day wearing his best new long-sleeved shirt (with classy fake ivory cufflinks) and a dark blue tie.

Except that no one told him nobody dresses like that there. Short sleeve shirts (but no polo tees) were standard issue uniform. Why? By 11am he found out why. Damn air-conditioning is so old it makes the office stuffy.

By 3pm, he was chugging down water every 5 minutes and trying to hide the underarms sweat patches. The next day, voila! He’s dressed in short sleeves like the rest of us! No tie.

Anyway, being the old fashioned office this was, they hardly gave him much work for the first 1 month, just “let him familiarize himself with the files first“. So day one, he read all the files. Same for day two. By day three he starts reading the files again.

Day four, I see him studying the phone directory. By the end of the day I think he can memorize all our telephone extensions already.

Over the next few days, he does all of the following – study his table calendar, looks out of the window, drinks his cup of coffee r-e-a-l-l-y s-l-o-w-l-y, read files again, tries to stay awake, checks his watch… you get the drift.

Anyway, I left the company soon after. I heard his left after month three. I wonder why.

They Say the Elections Are Coming…

They’ve started to re-pave the road leading into the kampong near my house, so I’m thinking the elections are coming soon. The last time they paved the pothole-ridden asphalt road was like, 5 years ago (go figure).

As any responsible Malaysian, you should go and register and vote. Here’s a few good reasons why.

Four Good Reasons To Register And Vote During the Election

• Legit bragging rights with your under-age friends that, “I’ve voted in the elections because I KNOW my vote COUNTS in making this great COUNTRY a better place, man.”
• Free political party buttons.
• You get to knock off early from work ‘to go and vote’. Usually, people take enough time to sneak back home for a snooze, have a kopi tarik at the mamak, THEN go and vote about 4.50pm.
• It’s just one BIG Malaysian Idol / AFUNDI contest, but with contestants that sing less and talk more.

I haven’t really voted that often, seeing that I just took my SPM a few years ago (ahem), but I remember the last one very well. I had to hitch a ride from my neighbours motorcycle since my car was blocked by too many cars jamming up the roads.

In the 5 minutes I rode pillion with the nice Indian uncle that lived on the next street, I had to listen to him talk about ‘this politician who has a Swiss bank account’ and ‘how corrupted that guy running in my wife’s constituency is’.

Next time I’m walking to the polling station. All 500 meters from my house to there.

Technorati Tags: election, malaysia

What? SPM Results Out Already?!

Last Monday the SPM results were released. Or so i was told.

So after a few months of slacking off and unbridled freedom for the 17 year olds all across the country, it was one weekend of anxious waiting and flurried text messages.

I remember during my time, (oh, just a few years ago) when they announced on national news that the SPM results would be released, I rushed out and told my classmate, who was living next door to me, about it. For some reason, he refused to believe me, saying the national news on TV was wrong.

No, really! Harjit Singh Hullon, the cornerstone of Malaysian prime time news said so! If Harjit says so it’s got to be true!

No-lah, cannot be, my friend said.

Hmm. Either he’s living in utter denial that his 3-month honeymoon will last forever, or he thinks the examiners take 6 months to mark boring essays.

Anyway, come Monday, all of us trooped back to school on our racing bikes. Most of our friends were there, looking like nervous wrecks, some rich ones who were off to expensive colleges already sent their parents / uncles / drivers / maids / personal secretaries to collect the result slips for them.

I don’t know if the arrangement is still the same, but they put the general results on the notice board for everyone to see. But this showed only whether you passed or failed, and which grade you obtained. And if you have any outstanding school fees (or did not return any of the school’s precious textbooks), they’d black out your results.

To get your individual results, you’ll have to line up in front of the office. All those kiasi topscorer students will be right in front, with their anxious parents looking on, clutching their Prada bags and Far Eastern Economic Journals. I was lining WAA-AAY at the back with all my mat rock friends, making bad jokes about the girls in my class.

So anyway, i got my results (its in a small slip of paper). First things first – check whether you passed Bahasa Malaysia or not (or else my dad will kill me). If not, can you ‘July paper’? Next check whether i passed English or not (or else my mom will kill me). Thank God I did, you know my England not powderful one la.

Technorati Tags: SPM, results, malaysia

Six Weird Things About Myself

Got tagged by sashi.

RULES: People who are tagged should write a blog post of 6 weird things about them as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave a comment that says ‘you are tagged’ in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

Hmm. actually i just remembered i did a similar one some time back, but hey, let’s try again. I’m pretty weird, so won’t be any problem coming up with 6 more things.

My mom told me that when I was small, i refused to eat anything black or dark in colour. Like black beans (tau sar). Like dodol. Like cincau. I suppose it didn’t have anything to do with the colour, just a coincidence. But dodol just feels icky in my hands… These days, i eat lots of black stuff – dark chocolate, um… and uh, um… hey, maybe my mom WAS right…

I love drainpipe jeans. Like the mat rocks used to wear in the 80′s. I know it shows my age, but i never liked the baggy, floor sweeping, boxer-revealing style. Faded blue drainpipes for me, or black.

I’m current watching Witchblade the anime. I just LOVE the way they pronounce it, something like “Uicchibureido“. Read a bit of the original Top Cow comics featuring Sara Pezzini back in the mid-90′s, didn’t fancy it much. Lots of jiggling around and posing. Now this anime, there’s still lots of jiggling AND a great story. And that Rihoko girl is sooo-ooo cute…

(pic from wikipedia)

I have a problem remembering complicated names. I usually have a fantastic memory for most other things (except work and school), but if I am introduced to someone with a name like Chiang Chiaw Shieng or Thiagarasu, i find myself struggling to remember after a few minutes. Unless i really concentrate to remember. But you’re always not prepared to remember especially when you’re meeting a lot of people.

When I was growing up in my early secondary years, I had a huge crush on my best friend, this girl i saw almost every day. She was fun, chatty and outgoing. But we only remain friends who shared a lot between us. I always thought feeling was mutual even in the very smallest way, but hey, i guess somethings are meant to be as they are. She’s now faraway married with kids of her own, as i am. Ah, to be young and carefree again.

I beginning to think I am a Calvinist in some ways all these years, but Arminian in others. I dunno. I believe what i believe, and am only beginning realize what is wrong and and what isn’t. I used to love this tune by Aerosmith that perhaps summed up my philosophy in life back then:

That one last shot’s a Permanent Vacation
And how high can you fly with broken wings?
Life’s a journey not a destination
And I just can’t tell just what tomorrow brings

I tag whoever who wants to do this. And let me know if you do.

Technorati Tags: aerosmith, calvinism, arminism, witchblade

The Obligatory Together-Gather Party Post

Was at the Together-Gather Bloggers Party on Friday night at Federal Hotel in the heart of the city. My office was less than 5km away, but with the !@%&!! traffic jam it took me more than 90 minutes. Some bloggers from PJ told me it took them 2 hours plus.

I definitely wasn’t the last to arrive, but I immediately recognized some familiar faces. First was of course, 5xmom. Can’t believe we’ve been such good friends for years but this is the first time we’ve met! Also met up with Jason after a few failed attempts, great to see you, bro.

Above: me and lilian

The regular folks were there – Suanie, James and Mae, Minishorts, Jeff Ooi (the last time I bumped into Jeff was at A&W’s in PJ!)

Above: me, jeff and lilian

Also got to meet up with some new faces (but familiar bloggers) LiewCF, Zeo, Gallivanter, etc.

Above: the fehmes suanie

To the end of the night, we were the last table left in the Skyroom, talking about Korean dramas (!) and kids with Laundryamah, sasha, mott, James and Mae, egghead and Lilian.

Above: minishorts!

Pretty good party, reached home late but still managed to catch the last few moments of the American Idol repeat.

Sorry not many photos, didn’t feel like snapping, plus lazy to go and blur out my face so many times. Kudos to rojaks and gang for a good job…