Some Obscure Movies That DID NOT Make It Here

Hah, year end, and I bet I’ll be seeing all these ‘Best Movies of 2005’ articles everywhere. Well, here are some obscure Hollywood movies, that for some strange reasons, DID NOT make it to Malaysia this year:

MR. & MR. Smith â€“ Openly queer couple find out deep dark secrets about the other person. One of them discovers that the other person is actually a former member of the Village People back in the 70â€™s, the other Mr. Smith digs out a secret that his partner was one of the original members of the wildly fabulous “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy“. A bitter showdown takes place, hurtful words are thrown at each other, the whole Ikea store is thrashed in the melee.

Bore of the Worlds â€“ Martians come en mass to subjugate the earth, one man wages a heroic battle to stop them. Unfortunately, Martians find out how shocking primitive earthlings are – no invisibility technology yet, no flying cars, Screamyx canâ€™t even reach 100kbps, etc. So the Martians decide to abort the takeover and turn back. Martians take over Klingon homeworld instead.

Charlie and the Illegal Chocolate Factory – a Hong Kong businessman’s illegal factory on gahmen land is threatened by the authorities to be torn down to build a new highway. Charlie stands firm with his band of Malaysian workers, rallying the local residents (who love his famous “Chocolate Egg Tart” specialty) into a ‘little guy against the gahmen’ fight. Charlie loses fight, factory is torn down, American mega-corporation buys over secret recipe.

Bartman Begins â€“ The Simpsonâ€™s first animated full length movie. Shows how Bart Simpson slowly transforms from annoying 10 year old brat into a dark, brooding, cape wearing crime vigilante with a cool car, utility belt and killer slingshot. Special appearance by Milhouse the Boy Wonder and the Comic Book Guy.

Fantastic 4-some – Top American 18SX movie for 2005. You can understand why it didn’t come to Malaysia.

Cinderella-la Man â€“ A poor orphan guy is mistreated by his stepfather and evil jock step brothers into doing hard manual labour like setting LAN networks, lining up to pay Screamyx bills, ordering pizza, etc. One day fairy Godfather appears (played by Marlon Brando) and turns poor orphan into Backstreet Boy look-alike and turns carrot into Mitsubishi Evo VIII. Orphan gets to go to ball, but gets beaten to a pulp by bouncers. Has to leave before midnight or he’ll change back, leave iPod behind.

Fried Chicken Little â€“ A shocking docu-drama expose in the style of Bowling for Columbine, investigating about the shrinking size of a fast-food restaurantâ€™s fried chicken. But at higher prices. Utterly shocking.

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