Duty Roster for Bachelor Pads

A few weeks ago, I read this posting by our local famous dentistry student blogger Jolene about her cleaning this papaya that smashed onto her porch column. No, really, its actually more interesting than it sounds here. (Check it out, but be prepared to wait for Blogdrive to load s-l-o-w-l-y…)

Anyways, after cleaning the mess and washing the white porch column, she wrote her name and date on the trunk of the poor papaya tree, to make sure she’s not the next person to clear the crap if and when it happens again.

(Side note: Personally, I’d PLUCK the fruits before they turn yellow, thereby decreasing the chances of the over-ripe fruits on going KER-PLASH on your porch / motorbike / car / clean white laundry / priceless Van Gogh painting put outside to dry in the sun. In addition to that, I may get to eat the fruit, of course not before removing all the other inhabitants and vermin from it. Anyway, I don’t live there, so I may not understand the story of these strange organic matter falling from the sky…)

So what she did was institute some sort of a duty roster for her housemates. Well, sort of. For cleaning stray falling yellow fruits.

The only time I stayed in a bachelor pad was this time in a house with 2 other guys and a girl. For most part I rented my own room, or stayed in a freaking dorm.

Anyways, coming back to this small house I bunked in. It was with my pal Dan, with his ex-colleague Josh, and Josh’s friend, a girl I can’t remember name. The girl hardly spoke to me, so let’s leave her out of this story.

(Here comes another side note: In fact, I’ve only seen this girl a few times, and only in the dead of night when the other two guys were not around. Come to think of it, Dan and Josh never seem to know about the 4th occupant in that house… Hmmm. Strange.)

Back to the main point. We guys do lots of strange chores and tasks around the pathetically small house. Most of these were often self inflicted, but that’s not the point. We never had a duy roster per se, but i reckon if there was, it’ll be something like this:

Basic Duty Roster for Bachelor Pad at #23A - February

Frankly, we never really follow the schedule, unless some girl comes to visit the place (not counting that girl appears at night). Or our parents.

Then there are the more rare tasks that requires latex gloves and / or surgical masks.

Auxillary Duty Roster for Bachelor Pad at #23A - February

I don’t understand why some people say bachelors are sloppy.

On The Road Again

Just came back from a long trip somewhere, that would explain the lack of update, probably the longest since I started blogging.

Dun worry, guys, I’m back with guns blazing, just need a day or two to recover… aching everywhere…

Seems I’ve been bitten by the travel bug. Some photos and stories (along with the usual everyday junk you’d expect) to follow soon.

Hey, what else can we do now?
Except roll down the window and let the wind blow back your hair
Well, the night’s busting open, these two lanes will take us anywhere
We got one last chance to make it real
To trade in these wings on some wheels
Climb in back, heaven’s waiting on down the tracks

Oh oh, come take my hand
We’re riding out tonight to case the promised land
Oh oh oh oh, Thunder Road
Oh, Thunder Road, oh, Thunder Road
Lying out there like a killer in the sun
Hey, I know it’s late, we can make it if we run
Oh oh oh oh, Thunder Road
Sit tight, take hold, Thunder Road

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Remembering Street Fighter II… Part 2

Continuing from yesterday, a brief rundown on the characters of the legendary Street Fighter II… These 8 are the original fighters, the first two are holdovers from the original prequel. Of the 8, I would say that I prefer Guile above the rest. But my all time favourite is not here, he’s one of the bosses in Champion Edition… you’ll know who in the next installment…

SFII is basically is button pad and joystick game, it was never meant to be played with a direction pad on the consoles. That’s prolly why the arcade version is still the favourite version.
(All pics taken from Love To Know Videogames. Fabulous site, go see it…)

Ryu – by far the most popular character, maybe because his moves were simple to execute and quite powerful. This Japanese guy seem to always have a thing against Ken. Hado-ken! This dude throws a mean fireball (but so does Ken). These days Ryu is a middle-aged stuntman trying to land small parts in B-grade Hong Kong action flicks. Without much success. At the moment, he’s negotiating to appear in a martial arts reality show in Latvia.

Which brings us to Ken – also quite popular, but I always thought he was almost too similar to Ryu. They’re both basically the same characters, but with different looks and clothes. Most beginners use these two guys, mostly because the moves are pretty easy to execute. Since the mid 90’s, Ken has hit some bad times, divorced twice, paying alimony, his weight balloon to 250lbs, and hit rock bottom with booze and depression. Sometimes, in his rare bouts of sobriety, he can almost remember the days he could whoop Ryu’s ass…

Guile – I remember reading this magazine back in the mid 90’s that the world champion used this character instead of the more popular Ryu or Ken. I like this guy too, since his moon kick was too easy to execute. He’s supposed to be some American GI soldier. In Hong Kong, he’s more popularly known as ‘Sou Par Tau’ (Broom Head) due to his hairstyle. Last we heard, Guile left the army and made big bucks as a private security consultant cum private eye. Now lives with his model wife somewhere in California. Contemplating running against Schwarzenegger for governor next term.

Chun Li – the obligatory sexy Chinese chick. Does this gravitationally impossible upside down helicopter spin with her legs. No, really. And also that lightning quick ‘mo ying kiok’ (no shadow kick).Not really popular among gamers, but you can use her speed to your advantage (insert your own innuendo here). Not much is known to what happened to her since then, but a Hong Kong daily once reported she married a shipping tycoon and spends her days playing mahjong and getting facials (insert your own…)

Blanka – Heheh, arguably the weakest guy, he’s supposed to be a green freak from the Amazon. His electrocution move is too easy to perform, button mashers love to pull this one off. I bet you remember his rolling thunderball move and that weird backflip. Blanka has been last seen traveling with a two bit circus, performing 3 shows per night for pennies. On weekends, generates power for small rural towns (by holding the down key and pressing punch repeatedly…haw, haw, haw)

Dhalsim – Prolly the most interesting dude on the roster, not popular to be played, but a pain to challenge in the higher levels. All his moves are legendary, his telescopic limbs, Yoga Fire!, Yoga teleport and lots more I can’t recall. But he has these really cool victory poses – either levitating in lotus position, or doing this freakish dance with his bobbing head. Some kids get nightmare about this weirdo. Dhalsim has brought his Eastern mysticism and yoga to Hollywood, packaged himself as a uber-cool New Age Guru to the movie stars like Tom Cruise and Paula Abdul, and has even started to dabble in Kaballah (See Madonna).

E. Honda – A Sumo reject, fights in a Japanese bath house, right next to the pools (No, really!). Never really liked this guy, always very easy to beat. You’ve to see his flying move and super fast hands. Especially when facing Chun Li (that pervert). According to some gaming forums, a few years ago E. Honda featured in a Japanese TV ad for Honda (!) Odyssey (“So big and spacious, I can even fly inside…”)

Zangief - big brute character with little finesse that most people don’t play. Has a decent piledriver and a spinning move. Can’t remember much else. Not much is known of his whereabouts these day, probably still stuck in some Eastern Europe gulag doing hard labour.

Next – the bosses (Vega, Sagat, Akuma, M.Bison, Balrog) and the new challengers (Cammy, Fei Long, Dee Jay and Thunder Hawk)…

Technorati Tags: Street Fighter II

Remembering Street Fighter II…

The other day, out of nowhere, I suddenly remembered about Street Fighter II. Now that’s iconic arcade game. There have been a few landmarks coin-ops that have made an impact in Malaysia, like 1942, Raiden, Hong Kong Mahjong (a perennial favourite this). But one that really took arcades across the nation, is none other than the humble Street Fighter II.

(all images taken from the Coin-Op Museum, they have an excellent site there…)

Just like Final Fantasy VII for the Playstation One, and Legend of Zelda for the Nintendo 64, SFII was a high water mark for its platform. I remember my friends were really into it, spending hours in seedy, dark and smoky arcade rooms with stacks of 20sen in a small basket in front of them. The SFII influence wasn’t limited to Malaysia only, it literally took the world by storm, I can remember at least half a dozen Hong Kong movies spoofing fight scenes from the game. One even featured Jackie Chan as Chun Li (now what was that called…?) My friend even had a collector’s edition of the SFII book showing all the moves for all the characters for arcade, SNES and the comparative systems in the day.

For those of you who have never heard of Street Fighter II, or who were born after that generation, it was a simple one on one beat them up game. There were about 14 characters from different parts of the world, later versions like World Warrior and Championship edition had more characters. You fought in best of 3 rounds, you lose a round when your health bar finishes. Lose two rounds and you lose the game (or add a coin within 10 seconds to ‘continue’.) If you played against the computer, you literally traveled around the world fighting challengers until you lost. While playing alone, anyone watching can come and challenge you by inserting a coin in the vacant seat, unless you explicitly tell him you don’t want to be challenged.

If you count the different versions on all the different platforms (arcade, console and PC) there are no less than 50 different versions, so it almost impossible to track them all. Other than the arcade version, the ones I played the most was PSX’s Street Fighter Zero.

What made SFII head above its competitors (like King of Fighters, Virtua Fighter, and Tekken) were, in my opinion down to 2 reasons – the gameplay, and the characters. The game play involved lots of hidden powers – the more you practiced, the better you become. With timing, great moves, and knowledge of each characters strength and weaknesses, the game was easy to play but difficult to master. I guess a lot of SFII experts can still go on and on about the beauty of the gameplay: the air juggling, the counter attacks, the super bar, the EZ versions, the Alpha versions, the new challengers, etc… Indeed on of the greatest coin-op games of all time…

The second reason, is of course the playable characters.

I’m running out of time. We’ll look at all the beloved characters tomorrow…

Technorati Tags: Street Fighter II, Street Fighter II

Journey to the North Part 3: Pearl of the Orient

Continuation of my posts from last week. You might want to check out Parts One and Two first. Lots of pix, not friendly to dial-up and the current Screamyx situation… I wonder when are they going to fix that problem?!

Right. Last off, we were leaving Perak and going further North. Ipoh to Penang is only a short 2 hour journey, and the traffic was good in the mid-morning. After lots of open fields and small kampungs, we finally reach the Penang Bridge.

I have always thought that the bridge, being a two lane on each side (except the third climbing lane at the ascend) was too narrow to handle the traffic, even when I first used it when the bridge was opened back in the 80’s. No doubt, the design of the bridge by the late Prof. Chin Fung Kee is an engineering achievement, but in my mind, the dual carriageway was too narrow for comfort, and it was only a matter of years that the traffic will outgrow the 2 lanes. Anyway, economics and engineering aside, having a bridge is better than a ferry, and two bridges are better than just one, and two bridges PLUS a monorail…

This is the centre of the bridge, ascending to allow tankers to pass under, between the island piers. Yep, I read the report by Prof. Chin many years ago, edited by Neoh Cheng Aik.

On to the island.

We missed a turning, and went round the whole island. I called it the ‘informal tour’ of Penang.

So after stopping in New Lane for lunch (next to Sunway Hotel), we reached our Hotel. I thought we were going to stay at ‘Tanjung Bungah Resort’, but it turned out to be ‘Tanjung Bungah Beach Hotel’… What’s the diff? No idea. Resort sounds much cooler, I suppose. But one step into the lobby and I had my doubts. I thought, “OMG, did I just check into an Ah Beng Hotel?”

(No offense to Daniel whatsisname and is horde of million screaming fans…)

Actually, it was a pretty nice hotel (Malaysian Idol endorsements notwithstanding), and since it was quite new, we didn’t have much to complain. (Except the parking in front of the hotel. Don’t get me started on that.)

(I couldn’t get a decent shot of the entrance without excluding the two posters of Daniel ‘I’m-SO-Cute-it-Distracts-From-My-Singing’ Tan.)

The hotel pool was a little small, but that didn’t stop my group from frolicking in it more than 3 times over the weekend…

They built this quaint little rock island just about 200m away from the beach. I wonder if it represents something…

View outside my hotel. The whole stretch of coastal road from Tg. Bungah to Feringghi is under going massive development, mostly upmarket condos and luxury homes. I’m not sure if Penangites are entirely comfortable with this, but on the other hand, where there is demand…

In the evening, we decided to go to the Batu Feringghi beach. Followed by the night market.

Two of us went parasailing. A few rules, though. Don’t wear loose clothing. Remove all valuables before going up. Be prepared to get soaking wet up to your chest. And watch out for jelly fish.

After that was dinner at the end of Batu Feringghi. One thing I must say that over the weekend, we enjoyed the seafood very much. It was quite cheap on the whole, considering that Penang is a tourist haven.

After a tiring day, we scooted back to the hotel, SOMEBODY didn’t one to miss her HOLY HOUR (Korean drama series dubbed in Bahasa Malaysia). Just joking aah…?

And check this out. Our hotel is 3G ready!!

I’m always happy to go on holiday, especially to the beach. I don’t really go into the water much (Straits of Malacca is a lot dirtier than the South China Sea). When I was a kid and I first came to the beach (my town was only a river side town), I loved the feeling of the waves eddying the sand below you feet. Still love the feeling now.

Technorati Tags: Penang Bridge, Penang, Tanjung Bungah, Malaysian Idol, Batu Feringghi

FAQ on doing Your $%&! Taxes

Okay, I’m taking a break from posting vacation pix to something more pressing…

April is known for many things – not least of all is tax time in Malaysia. Yep, it’s that time of the year again when we dig through our drawers for old receipts and lament over the amount of taxes we have to pay.

As it is, there are a few things to note. The Income Tax Dept, LHDN, is in their final stages of implementing the self assessment tax system. This does not mean you can decide to pay zero tax ringgit all by yourself, even though a lot of people would love that. Nope, it means you calculate everything in the form yourself, and file in the returns and mail the check (if you’re unlucky), keep the other documents like your EA form and receipts (for up to 5 years, I think.)

For those doing taxes for the first time, I’ve compiled an FAQ to help you out in this time of distress:

What’s the best and easiest way to do your taxes without problems?
Marry a tax accountant.

Failing that?
Suck up to one.

No, seriously. I really need help doing it!
OK, fine, most tax accountants I know don’t look like James Denton or Teri Hatcher, so the next best thing is… read the manual. No really, read it. I know it’s as exciting as watching old people eat, but it will usually answer most of your questions, even if you’re one of those category of taxpayers that ‘menderma harta karun kepada negara’ (donation buried treasures to gomen) or something like that.

But I can’t understand Bahasa Malaysia! I only know 3 words in BM, and they’re all unprintable.
Really? Which 3 words? Fret not. You can go to the LHDN website and download the English instructions.

I keep seeing this acronym PCB in my form. What does it stand for? Pussy Cat Babes?!
PCB = Printed Circuit Board, Persatuan Cuci Basikal, etc… No, it stands for ‘Potongan Caruman Bulanan’ or monthly scheduled deductions. Mystery solved. No pussycats involved.

How much taxes are we paying really?
Quite a lot, actually. Some people will tell you that in UK or US or Australia they pay like 33% or whatever, don’t pay any attention to them, they’re just bragging to you that they’re worked overseas while you’re here earning miniscule Ringgit Malaysia. Taxes are about 20-30%, depending on your income. If you’re a minimum wage coolie like me, you may not even have to pay taxes.

Speaking of minimum wage, do I need to file my returns even if I’m earning be low the minimum taxable amount?
Tell your boss you need a raise.

If I find out that I’ve been overpaying my taxes, can I get a rebate in a day or two?
Oh, yes, you’ll get a rebate, but I won’t wait by my post box in the next few days if I were you… ahem…

I heard that you can do your returns online?
Yep. Provided your Screamyx doesn’t screw up. But trust me, there’s no greater thrill than doing your taxes the old fashion way on the second last day and rushing to the department and joining the hysterical mass of last-minute Malaysians freaking out at the 3-mile long waiting line.

Plus, you may have a chance to make the front page of our ever-informative newspapers on the 1st of May.

What if I don’t file my taxes? What’ll happen?
I hope you like horizontal stripes…

I haven’t kept any of my receipts or insurance slips from the past year! What do I do?!
Pay through your nose for taxes, my friend. On TOP of your monthly deductions.