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EPL Predictions and Awards

Published by simon on August 25, 2005

So footie fever is on us again. So I’m doing a kind of an EPL award thing. We all know Chelsea’s the richest team, and Wigan has the shortest history, and all that, right? Well, here are more predictions you may or may not have heard about.

Team which will feature in the least number of live telecasts this season:
Sunderland. Second is Fulham, followed by West Brom.

Manager most likely to get into a verbal fight with another manager
Arsene Wenger. Second place is Sir Alex Ferguson. Third will be Mourinho, against every other manager in the league.

Team which most likely have players moaning about squad rotation
Tottenham. Second place is Newcastle. Third would be Chelsea.

Manager most likely to complain about disallowed goal / unfair penalty
David O’Leary (Aston Villa), Sam Allardyce (Bolton), Alex Ferguson (Man U).

Players most likely to talk about retirement (again) this season
Alan Shearer (Newcastle), Dennis Bergkamp (Arsenal), Roy Keane (Man U).

Player most unlikely to appear on the cover of FourFourTwo magazine
Ivan Campo (Bolton), Danny Mills (Man City) and Dwight Yorke (I can’t even remember who he plays for now).

Players most likely to be red carded at some point this season
Mikael Silvestre (Man U), Ashley Cole (Arsenal), Lucas Neill (Blackburn), Robbie Savage (Birmingham).

Players most likely to get injured at some point this season
Freddie Ljungberg (Arsenal), Louis Saha (Man U), Harry Kewell (Liverpool)

Average number of chewing gum sticks Sir Alex Ferguson goes through in one match
11. If for Champions League match, then 17.

Team not likely to score the most goals in the league
West Brom, Everton, Portsmouth.


Manager most likely to wear shorts on the sidelines

Mick McCarthy (Sunderland)

Players most likely to get substituted in the second half
Arjen Robben (Chelsea), Tiago (Chelsea), Didier Drogba (Chelsea).

Player most likely to come on as substitute in the second half
Joe Cole (Chelsea), Wayne Bridge (Chelsea), Shaun Wright-Phillips (Chelsea)

Players most likely to be loaned out during the January transfer window
Craig Bellamy, half of Tottenham’s midfielders, a few of Chelsea’s millionaire substitutes.

Players most likely NOT to play much this season
Geremi (Chelsea), Carlo Cudicini (Chelsea), Carvalho (Chelsea).

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  1. Inevitable Said,

    Dwight is playing in Australian League now … if I am not mistaken Sidney United FC ???

  2. Eunice Said,

    Err..Tiago (Chelsea) has left for Lyon and Cudicini (Chelsea) played the whole game this morning against West Brom when we trashed them 4 - nil … we means my team and I

  3. Boone Said,

    Well, Lucas Neill has already obliged you when he went two-footed on Edgar Davids’ in this morining’s game.

  4. simon Said,

    inevitable - omg, that’s as bad as playing for Perlis FC…

    Eunice - waah… first time you comment aah? I dunno you chelski fan leh…

    Boone - that no good ruffian, him and his friend what’s his name? The one that tried to attack the linesman last year?

  5. Crazy Said,

    I like that point about fergie and his chewing gum. :D

  6. Kuzco Said,

    I was going to say something but Eunice said it.

    and i bought the whole season one of Desp. houswives….so gancheong now…dunno what’s Mary Alice’s secret ?

  7. Kuzco Said,

    if you’re a footballer and you want to celebrate your goal in style(in case you score), learn from Chelsea this season especially Lampard and Drogba.
    Seemed like they practiced how to celebrate goals too(if you saw the match where Chelsea thumped ‘em 4 nil)

  8. vincent Said,

    kuzco : Those stupid fellas copied Bebeto, Cafu and Romario who first did it in the 1994 world cup.

  9. simon Said,

    vincent & kuzco - vince is right. it started with Bebeto in the World Cup. His wife just had a baby at that time. if i’m a footballer i’ll NEVER celebrate like that!

  10. Boone Said,

    Well, either Roy Keane or Pat Vieira holds the record for the most dismissal in the EPL (the Vinny Jones Award), and we’ll see who are potential thugs who can beat the record. Neill should be more than half-way there by now. He got away scot-free when he broke Jaime Carragher’s ankle 2 years ago.

  11. simon Said,

    paddy can’t add more cards. roy and neill can. but i’d put me money of keano.

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