England Squad Woes

Now that the holidays are over and Arsenal has virtually lost the Premiership title, let’s talk about something less depressing - the England squad. It is strange that the 23 member composition of this team can stir so much controversy and debate all over the world, and especially by third class bloggers half a world away that have never even set foot in the British Isles.

Over the past 2 years, the two positions that have been the most problematic for Sven Goran-Eriksson would be rightback and left wing.

Let’s talk about the left wing position first. It is ironic that England has a shortage of good leftwingers. Most of the world’s best players in that position play in England. Pires, Kewell, Duff, Giggs earn their keep in the Premiership week in and week out. More painful for Sven and all England is that Giggs could have easily turned out for the three Lions, but now proudly wears the dragon of Wales. Ditto for Duff, but that’s a long story.

So Sven has 2 options on the left wing. Either play a good right-footer in that position (either a right winger or central midfielder) or, play an inexperienced leftie. He has tried the first choice before, the list of players trudging uncomfortably down that left passage include Gerrard, Scholes, Wright-Phillips, Jenas, Joe Cole, etc. If he plays option 2, it would be Wayne Bridge. It speaks volumes when in some games Ashley Cole plays left wing better Bridge. Stewart Downing has recently emerged as another choice. However, Downing is not in the same class as say, Pires or Giggs, and it is only by a twist of luck that he can wear the national jersey. Perhaps he may grow to be into a great player one day, who knows. But left wing is too important a position to gamble on a greenhorn. But too bad for Sven, he has not many options. Some people are touting Lee Hendrie of Aston Villa, but I don’t think he’ll get a chance.

Now on to right back. I can understand why left wing is difficult to fill, there are more righties in the world as compared to lefties. Which makes the rightback situation baffling. Currently Gary Neville plays for England, backed up by either Jamie Carragher or Matthew Upson. Neville is way past his sell-by date, Carragher does not play regularly in that position, Gunner-reject Upson is not experienced enough to play in the World Cup.

Again the problem is the lack of English rightbacks in the Premiership. As the EPL gets more and more popular and cashloaded every season, more and more foreigners are flocking there, which means less and less Englishmen playing regularly. Ironically Sven has no such problems for left back, Ashley Cole probably has that position locked for the next 8 years or so. As for centreback, the are at least 8 good players lining up to fill the 2 slots - Campbell, Ferdinand, Terry, King, Southgate, Brown, Woodgate, etc.

So until the next qualifier for Germany ‘06, the debates will still go on.

Not Feeling Great

Well, it had started as a fine CNY holiday but yesterday, it hit rock bottom for me. I had a loud disagreement with my parent’s neightbour (not the nice Malay family having a kenduri kahwin, the other one). The reason for the bust-up is irrelevant, I don’t want to talk so much about it. I guess it has been a building up for a few years now, since they moved in.

I’m pissed off at myself for losing my cool, and to let myself to be bothered by the petty stuff. I haven’t felt so bothered about other people like this for a long time now. I remember when I was growing up, there were many occasions, helped by the fact that there many jerks out there. Usually rich jerks who like to pick on the poor, little guy. As the years went by it became less common, prolly becoz I learnt to stand up to them, or not be bothered by them so much. But this incident really burns.

I hope I can get over it soon.

Let’s talk about tailgaters on Malaysian highways. You know what a tailgater is, they drive at 200km/h on the fast lane of the highway, come a few inches behind your car and flash at you until you move aside for them to pass. They usually drive either

• Mercedes (or BMW) or some imported expensive car I can’t pronounce;
• 4WDs or
• those Mat racing with their souped-up Wiras.

Obviously, they are above the law, they don’t need to obey the speed limit, unlike commoners like you and me. Their time is too important and expensive to be wasted on something like road safety or civic consciousness. Traffic summonses? Who cares? RM150 is spare change for me, what?! Summon me lah!

Anyway, here’s a joke I found off the Net. Kinda tells how I’m feeling at the moment:

When Joe’s wife ran away, he got so depressed that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist. Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said, “Life isn’t worth living.”
“Don’t be stupid, Joe,” said the psychiatrist. “Let work be your salvation. I want you to totally submerge yourself in your work. Now, what do you do for a living?”
“I clean out septic tanks,” Joe replied.

First Day of The Rooster

Well, I here in my hometown celebrating the first day of the rooster. Last night there was a massive fireworks party that lasted for more than half an hour all over town. Yes, there is also a fireworks ban being enforced at the moment.

I expected all towns across Malaysia would be the same.

My Malay neigbour is having a kenduri kahwin for his son tomorrow. So we’re having problems getting out of the driveway due to the canopy in front of the house. I must go to the monkey park this evening! It’s a sacred tradition!

This will be the first kenduri kahwin that will be serving nasi minyak together with mandarin oranges.

Until this evening, when hopefully I can give a report on the visit to the monkey park.

Some Good Advice for Chinese New Year

There’s two more days to go until the big day. Anyhows, for those of you reading this, here are some tips and pointers for surviving the holiday season (some of it from experience):

1. Try not to pig out on too much BBQ meat / cookies / keropok / munchies. It’ll take forever to work off the pounds you put on in 5 days.
2. If you’re still not married and over 30, better be prepared with the barrage of “so when are you getting married” and “why no girlfriend/boyfriend” questions.
3. There will be at least 3 concert specials on TV - usually featuring Andy Lau, Sammi Cheng and/or Aaron Kwok.
4. You don’t get ang pow after 21 years of age. Even if you’re still not married.
5. More than one relative or friend will say to you “Wah, long time no see, you put on weight already ah!” (This happens even though you know you’ve actually lost weight).
6. Eating too much mandarin oranges can be bad for your cough. And it makes your fingernails dirty. Ditto for kuaci.
7. Your nephews and nieces seem to naughtier and louder every year.
8. Your parents’ friends will come and visit at the most inopportune time, like when your favourite TV show is about to start or when you are about to defeat the big boss on PS2.
9. Your neighbours and their visitors will indiscriminately park in front of your house gate and block you. Even though it wide open and you are reversing out.
10. With all the elderly uncles and aunties around, you again reminded of your shockingly poor grasp of dialect…
11. There’s nothing good to watch on local TV. Unless you love those re-run Jet Li & Jackie Chan movies.
12. You subconsciously compare the size your car with your relatives’ and friends’.
13. Ban or no ban, those pesky kids next door will be letting off firecrackers like there is no tomorrow. At 4pm in the afternoon.
14. Waking up too late in the morning gives you a headache.
15. Unless you’re into gambling or partying, there isn’t much to do after midnight.
16. Drink lots of water. Its gonna be blazing hot for the next few days.

and lastly…

17. On the first day of work after the holiday, you will check the calender for the next coming public holiday!

Anyway, Happy New Year everyone!!!

Chinese Zodiac

The other day my wife and I were discussing about the 12 animals of the chinese zodiac. As Christians we don’t believe in the significance of the zodiac (both English or Chinese) and whatever characteristics the animals represent, but as Chinese people, it has always been a source of fun and entertainment for my family.

Shockingly the both of us could not even remember the 12 animals correctly, let alone the order. After a few minutes of stumbling in the dark, we whipped out a note book and started listing down the years. We went like, “OK, my brother was born in 1967, he’s definitely a goat” etc using our friends as points of reference. Let me just note that I’m not saying my brother is a real goat, nor does he acts or look like one, only that he was born in the year of the goat. Must clarify that…

So after like ten minutes we got the final list:

Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Ram (goat), Monkey, Rooster, Dog, and Boar.

I just check on the ‘Net and found out that the rat was the first in the cycle. I remember a story about how the rat tricked the cat in a race to enter the listing of the zodiac. Something like the “Ancient China’s Amazing Race for the Top Twelve Animals”. Or “Survivor China : Make the List or Be Eaten”. That was supposed to be the reason for why cats hated rats. But the story clearly makes no mention on why dogs hate cats. Or if a real 20 foot dragon actually appeared in the flesh for this particular race.

Which makes me wonder - what happened the to other animals who did not make the list? Did they not come for the race / selection? Or did they actually come but came in 13th place and below? For example, I wonder if the Dou Na the Duck actually came in 27th because he chose the wrong coach. Or if Jiang Bo the Elephant failed to read the route marker properly or was voted out in the tribal council. Or did Wei Ni the Bear get 2 yellow cards for an illegal challenge on Yi Or the Donkey?

This is all very mysterious. I suspect the Han Dynasty suppressed vital information on what really happened. Maybe after 5000 years, the historical documents and telephone transcripts can be declassified and finally revealed to the eager public.

Maybe I’ll finally find out the real reason why lion only dance during Chinese New Year, but not when see them at the zoo.

3 Complaints

For those of you who spend at least two hours in the car everyday caught in the jam (like me), you would have heard the ad on the radio by a certain government agency. It’s in Bahasa Malaysia, and it’s done in a rap style.

Here’s my take on it – ITS BAD! REALLY BAD!

I’ve nothing against rap or Bahasa Malaysia, but the ad sounds like a ‘pantun’ written by a 12-year Vanilla Ice fan! If this was 1988 when MC Hammer just got started with the rap thing, I can understand it. But this is 2005! Hello?! Have you heard of Kanye West? Black Eyed Peas? 50 cent? Just watch MTV and see how hip-hop has progressed with the times!

———-
OK, second rant. Traffic jams – BAD.
:(
———-

Third point. Let’s get back to radio ads. How many ads have you heard in the past 2 months that sound almost alike? I can think of 3 of them that go something like this (try to picture them in annoying stereotypical Malaysian voices):

Annoying Person A – Hello, how are you?
Annoying Person B – Can’t talk now! Got to go that place to buy this thing at so-much-so-much. Plus they giving this-thing-this-thing FREE!
Annoying Person A – Really?! This thing at that place at so-much-so-much price? Plus they giving this-thing-this-thing FREE? How can?!
(at this point I must note that they have to repeat that line of conversation to emphasize the point. Yeah, like in a REAL conversation…)
Annoying Person B – Yeah, can you believe…
Annoying Person A – toot… toot…toot… (sound of phone after hanging up)
Annoying Person B – Hello? Hello?

Wow, even I can write radio ads!

New Year in those days

Another 5 days to go until Chinese New Year. Apart looking forward to the holiday (read: no work), I can’t seem to get into the spirit of the season. I watched this documentary on Nat Geo once about the celebrations in China. It said that the New Year meant the most to the very young and the very old. How true.

Chinese New Year as a small kid for me was a blast. We would be in Malacca, at my paternal grandmother’s place. My grandmother, being a respected matriach of the clan, would have a long stream of visitors and relatives. That meant cousins and lots of fun times.

We always hung a red cloth around and above our door, a custom special only to Hakkas in Malacca. As a Christian, its mirrors the passover practice, a significance lost on us at that age.

As I look back now, I can remember a lot of discreet practices that I rarely see these days - small lime tree in our porch, the traditional dinner dishes, the annual gathering for family photograph, white cherry blossom in the living room, etc…

Sadly once my revered grandmother passed on many years ago, we stopped going to Malacca and eventually stopped celebrating New Year. Partly because I was born a Christian, and New Year meant more as a family gathering and not a religious festival.

I remember from very young on, I always told people that ‘my family didn’t really celebrate New Year‘.

I’m looking forward to spending the holidays at home finishing my books, watching my brother’s VCDs, watching American Idol and Amazing Race, and going to my in-laws in Ipoh, where the celebrations are on a full-blown grand scale.

I’m everywhere I go, I’m bringing my jogging shoes with me. This is to counter the effects of the bak kua.

****

Kenny would have been safely cremated by now.

In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life through our
Lord Jesus Christ, we commend to Almighty God our brother Kenny, and we commit his
body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. The Lord
bless him and keep him, the Lord make his face to shine upon him and be gracious
to him, the Lord lift up his countenance upon him and give him peace. Amen.

One Of Our Own…

Today has started on a poignant note. An acquaintance of mine, Kenny has passed on to be with the Lord. He is not even 30 yet, but in the short time he has been on earth, it is more than obvious he has his fair share of hardship and cruel irony.

In our world today, the passing from life to the hereafter has been trivialized and over-sentimentalized for whatever reasons beyond me. For Kenny, I wish I had known him better, and he has by all means fought a good fight.

See you in heaven on that glorious day.

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
John 14:6

In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”
Genesis 3:19

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
II Timothy 2:7

A Very Public Holiday

Yesterday was 1st February, City Day. Or Federal Territory Day, a public holiday for KL, Labuan and Putrajaya. When I was studying in JB, their City Day was on 1st January. (Johor does not celebrate New Year’s Day – for reason please refer to Tingkatan 2 Sejarah textbook).

Most KL people see City Day as a trade-off with Thaipusam. KL celebrates City Day but not Thaipusam, the opposite applies for Selangor. Complicated? Not really. Wait til we talk about Nuzul Quran. The important thing is that it’s a holiday. And for Malaysians, public holidays is a pretty touchy subject. In most private offices, a large portion of time in January is spent planning and talking about this matter. You’ll hear things like, “Wah, so many holidays fall on Saturday, wan. Wasted only lah” or “If I take Friday and Monday off, I get 6 days off, man!” and so on.

Last month at work, we were asked to submit our annual leave schedule. Now this is something new to some of us. How on earth are we going to plan for something 6 to 12 months from today?! My colleague, who like me, came from a contractor background commented that working with a contractor, people only talked about, not annual leave. Any mention of annual leave would probably result in a reprimand from the management.

Anyway, back to yesterday. You would think that it would have been a great idea to get some errands done around town where it was a working day. Fat chance. The whole place was jammed up with snarling traffic. With some professional maneuvering around the roads, I managed to escape to jams and get to the banks. Some of my friends who were working in PJ told me the traffic in the morning was worse than usual.

On the plus side, I have only 3 and a half working days to reach my Chinese New Year break. Woo-hoo! See? We can’t stop talking about public holidays!!